I've been here about a week now and I cannot tell you how inadequate I have felt. Time and again- I didn't realize how important my spanish skills were...
It has been of the hardest things to deal with.
My host family doesn't know english at all, yet God has looked out for me and my roommate is pretty much a pro. My host family is also incredibly precious; with four little girls and the biggest hearts- they feed us every morning.
God is very good.
Even though I feel like I shouldn't be here, I am here and I know God has a reason for me being here, just like every other part of my life. I know, even though I don't at the time, He always has a plan. He has comforted me and has placed encouragement in my life exactly when I need it.
I'm working at the media site this summer with Jose and thankfully he speaks english. He also said he would love to help me learn.
Another "full-timer," Nick (who just turned 40) also encourage me just the other night. He said quite a bit that spoke into my life, but what's most important is that he told me to take risks and ask questions. I really just appreciated everything he had to say and he basically reiterated everything that has been swimming in my head lately.
It is not enough that I am here. I have to go out of my way. I have to give up myself to be everything God is asking of me.
And how silly of me... I just told a friend that God's refining process is not a painless thing. Let me eat my words.
"Put down your pride Chelsea Elizabeth, become a "fool." This is not about you, and it never has been. Be My hands, Be my feet. All for My Glory. Become uncomfortable, become vulnerable, become a vessel. Be unafraid."
Chelsea, it's so good to know that you're there and you're safe! I miss you girl and have been thinking so much about you. I've been feeling unbelievably unprepared in these past few days but I know that regardless of how I'm feeling, I am going and God is going to have his way in my life this summer. Not being fluent in spanish is my biggest concern but I knew that God has called me to be in Costa Rica and so I know that I just have to trust him through this.
ReplyDeleteI know that once I am there, I will know what it means to fully rely on God and I know you are beginning to understand that more and more while being in Guatemala.
I love you so much and I am praying for you that you will truly rely on him to be the sustaining God that you know he is!!!