Purpose

Some things never change and some things, thank God, do.

As I have begun my senior year of college, and wondered where it went, I look back at all the changes. I look back through all the friends I have made, I look back at each year and know I was in a different place each time. I look back and I see the Constant.
These thoughts brought me to tears today during worship. So thankful for every individual that Abba has brought into my life. So thankful for the dear friends that have stuck with me since we began this journey.
So overwhelmed with Abba's love for me... to take the care into forming this world and giving me a place in it.
This summer God spoke to me a lot about community and gave me an idea of what that looks like. He's given me a somewhat clear picture of how I am suppose to live my life, according to His will. Of course, I'm not sure how it's going to look, exactly. But, I know it's something I can't do on my own, and I keep getting hung up on that part... I keep looking at it independently. I bring this up, because taking that risk is scary!! And as I told a friend- "I know, Jesus takes care of the birds. But... I'm not a bird!" And, he gently reminded me- "you're right, you're not a bird, you are more important to God than the birds. So, if God takes care of them, He's going to take care of you."

Honestly... God has given me no reason to doubt Him. But my head and heart knowledge are not on the same page. And as a human; I want control. But, as I have also recently read in Francis Chan's "Crazy Love" I need to get over myself; like I said earlier, God gave me a place in HIS world, I don't call the shots.

Ha... I started this post on a completely different topic.
I guess... senior year is for this; to figure out what's next.